Desires are what you are

Desires are what you are……

It was your desire to be a human,
It was your desire to behave like one ,
It was your desire to live like one ,
That God granted…..

Desires are what you are……

You wished to be loved by all
You wished to be respected by all
You wished to be justified by all
That is what you have made yourself into,

Desires are what you are……

You saw equality ,
You saw compassion,
You saw hate …..
This is what you got

Desires are what you are…..

The world is huge,
So is your desire ,
But the biggest thing is your Conscience
And your weapon is choice……

Choices are what you want from your desires….

Desires are what you are……

Sonu Anand…..

My Photos..... thanks to Moon Gogoi.

Thankyou Moon,
Now that i am working towards making acting as a career. Desperately needed few photos done. Now, here came my dear friend moon and he clicked my pics. These pics are taken by normal digital camera. He is working as a cameraman. Many friends were telling me to go for professional photographers but i was not into that . One point being i didn't want to waste so much money. If you have heard these photo shoots are very costly.

Second point my opinion is that acting is more important than the photos. Those photo shoots are for models , as i belive in acting the casting directors just need photograph of actors face which is usually called Headshot. To have a idea of how they look. They can't transform the actors into someone else which they don't look like which is done in modelling.

Now, my concentration is doing few roles and know what my acting calibre is ???????????????????

Nobody knows...... done theatre but film and television is a different ball game it is like comparing badminton to lawn tennis. I will give my best. Just hoping it will be considered best by others too. :-)

I had to cut my beard because of the photoshoot very sad. :-(

Sonu Anand







PS. I hate photos worked on photo shop but moon said you have to work on it as these days everybody uses it if they are giving photos for professional use.

So, the first phot is without photoshop and rest two worked. Let me know which one you like most.

OH God ! why was i so mean???????????????

I was 7-8 years old. I with my brother had gone to a sweet shop. We were to purchase mithais there especially prepared by them. That sweet was so famous and it was in a village and who ever passed that place would buy it. Why we were there. My father being a doctor would get transferred to weird places and this one was a block called Chauparan, Hazaribagh district, Jharkhand state. I was studying in Kurseong, Darjeeling at that time and we had three months winter break Dec-feb. because of snowfall.

Now that we were in a village. I was sad............ i couldnot get whatever i wished for.....
Now, coming back to the point.
when we were at the shop there was a small kid who was a sort of help in that sweet shop and for some reason he started laughing. And i looked at him and didn't like it... I felt he is laughing looking at me . I felt maybe he was looking at my shoe.... and laughing........ Weird and pathetic me.

While we were going back to our place , I told my brother that i am not going to wear this shoe because he was laughing at it....... My brother tried to convince me and i think i didn't wear it again.....
..................
Can't remember any another incident but yes i have done many things which i hate and feel i had not done.... because it hurt someone else..... When we are in the real world and someone else shows meanness then we realize what we have been doing or even before that....... There are two ways in which a person can react .......... He can be more mean or become more polite.... I choose the later.
I am a Happy man.
Sonu Anand

PS. my dear brother it would be nice if you could add your side of the story too in the comment section....

20 days of doing nothing............................................................

20 days of doing nothing............................................................

My college completed on 18th june. I had thought will be working straight after this. Next day i am off to work and to my great great surprise nothing came up......... for 20 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had been working a little before finishing college so knew a few people working in great places and positions and to my great great surprise nothing came up .............. for 20 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally i realized the truth that nothing comes easy, even if you are ready to work hard there are few things everyone one has to follow. So, i made my CV. I had never thought will be doing so. I used to think i have been working since college will get some place some where but nothing came up.............. for 20 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Never thought will be giving interviews and all but when college is completed you realize you are no prince of siberia. You have to slog like everyone else does. Pressure of standing on your own feet takes it's toll and you are all down in the dump. But these off times can make you realize what you really want to do..........

After 20 days of doing nothing I know.

I KNOW
what i wanted to do .......
It took a lot from me first i was staying alone..................
I realized how prisons must be................
because when you don't have any motive you are in prison................
20 days was enough i could have gone mad...............
there were few offers which i could take but where not related to my field........... so i waited and waited.............. Didn't take any of those............
First of all, i want to tell you all i want to be a film-maker............................
i was getting things in PR and journalism ...... ofcourse not through any interview or any thing but through friends................ With whom i had worked so that qualifies for interview as they know your work.
But no work work in film as an Asst. Director.......................... previously there were offers from Serial when i was in college but now when i needed there was none............ :-)
I got really irritated......... and i had done theatre from Dec 2006 till June 2008 and after that rarely because i was doing other things.......................
So, i had ACTING in mind...... but never wanted to give it a try............... really never................
because i really loved doing it.......... i used to think i will do it in theatre as it is much fun and never work for money and other S**t.........

Finally, where am i ............................
I have decided to adopt ACTING as my proffession....................... Had no other way out........
But you know what >>>>>>>>>>>>>
IT IS GOING TO BE REAL FUN ..........................................
Wish me luck and hope to see me soon....
yessssssssssssssssss
20 days of doing nothing had me discover myself.

Really, this is what i want to do........................
Sonu Anand.

money O money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now i have completed my graduation. I don't think i want to pursue studies further. So, now i have to earn money to feed myself as soon as possible and this is what came to my mind...........................

money O money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

never thought you are so important,
never gave you that importance,
never i had to work for you,
never dreamed i will write for you.

money O money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

always you were there,
always my wallet was full of you,
always you were allotted to me,
always i assumed you as my silent companion.

money O money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

but it is hard to keep you around,
but you have a big ego,
but want to be respected,
but you are a dictator.

money O money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

how can i follow my dream,
how can i be what i want to,
how can i just be your slave,
how can i just work for you.

money O money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you bring more sadness than happiness,
you make us work like machines,
you result in a lot of enmity,
you turn wise men into crooks.

money O money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i urge you to be lenient,
i urge you to stop punishing people who misuse you,
i urge you to loosen your standards,
i urge you to come easy to wise men too as you come to crooks.

money O money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We expect you to be a bit more forgiving.

Sonu Anand.

Where am I ???????????????????

I am not writing.
I have just completed my Graduation this month.
Waiting for my result
figuring what to do
Having fun ,
and waiting for real life to begin?????????????????????

Sonu Anand

wrrfomlzegybi0523w/ travel

It is chintu ........ it is good na..... this is what my sister's 4 year old son says after writing wrrfomlzegybi0523w. now he wantst o writew more;dueaxtbtculiopergfcdrfhedrxhrdcnncbbb n nmnmgyjiamnuipmbtxsh. esuhpokjtcaqvgnjmgrv020574i43210jvbbjgjgzcghbhmhjhtcdfyjghntrhf.gdhrghgfcghjuvddkbfjgnbn vvcccvbnnnbnbbnbngncvvnvnnnv1```````````````````````gsvdcdfvgdfvgfhngnhnbvnbhn mfn c x
i now say that now you have written, tell me what it is.... he says why you always talk rubbish can't you read that the photographs i saw of yours were nice. this is what i have written........ now he has found interest in the kitchen so he is there helping his mother cook.

TRAVEL
Yesterday i was travelling by bus wrote a blog entry on my mobile but when i tried publishing it, don't know what went wrong it vanished no network, no blog.

for last few days i have been travelling started from mumbai to chennai then to hyderabad(now) on monday will be back in mumbai. So was not actively blogging but was reading my friends blogs.

I started my journey from Dadar stn. As usual i had a waiting ticket. I had taken a sleeper tic hoping that tics are more in this class and will get confirm. but NO and since i had booked online it got cancelled. :-)
I have felt these days what ever i have in my mind that is stuck happens....... i had a ( ) in my mind to travel general class once. so here i had a chance bought the ticket for general. There i meet one guy who said he opens the door of the general bogie he said he will get me seated i will have to pay 100rs. i said it will be more than good. when i reached that place with him i saw atleast 200-300 passengers in a queue to board the train............ i told that guy i am coming in 2 mins. he said come back soon or your seat goes. I left that place and said to myself i cannot do this..... I have 100 rs that i can pay but what about those who are standing there for many hours and expecting to get a seat. i said this is not fair. i left i thought i will talk to the TC. to convert my tic to sleeper i will manage. When i was went to that guy he was super busy saying that the train has 80 waiting list passengers and nothing can be done.

I said to myself " sonu you always wanted to travel general once this is your chance." i waited and waited and when the train started i boarded a general compartment.

GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
there was no place to stand.......
i looked inside women children men all packed in like potatoes in a gunny back. ffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.ffffff....
i looked no space ....
children crying ..... men fighting....... women siting ........ i wondered how they move about.........

i could not imagine...... i was standing and reading a book..... it was ok..... no language understood by me...... people talking in marathi or tamil........ nobody was talking to me........ they looked at me like i was a intruder who didnot know how to behave among........

when i had to travel sleeper class i used to say..... to people this government should not run sleeper train.... in this country..... you get the feel of how wheat feels when it is being baked in the oven. only AC trains......

but now what do i say: i say to the government please run all general trains like they are running sleeper trains......
i now understand this country has a long way to go........ when you have currency in your pocket when you feel the whole country is developing every one is like you every one has a bed to lie down in the night when .....................

Finally when the train stopped at Kalyan...... hundreds pushed in again...... can you imagine in space for just 40 passengers they were travelling don't know how much........????????????

i really wonder why this has not happened by now regular and daily all general trains..... GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

they say railways is in profit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! do something my friend make your fellow humans feel like humans not cattle........ when i used see a truck full of goats or chicken tempos i used to ask my dad why can't they be treated well he used to smile..........................

NOW i know the answer..............

i was suffocated this time when the train left kalyan............ i started waiting for Pune when it came...... i was like .... ohhhh i couldnot get out because after 10 people got down........ 100s charged in. ii ii iii i with alll my strength with request and anger stormed out.....................
one man standing out said" today the train was too packed" i smiled............ relieved but looked back couldnot imagine how can people travel for 24 hrs sitting in same position almost...... they will reach chennai... tomo.......

i went to the TC. now and asked him to fine me and give me a sleeper tic. he did that and you know what i got a confirm birth after 30 mins sitting on the head of the TC. why could not this be done before.................. i have lost my trust in railways............... but this is the best in the world.........????????????? who said so????????????? donno???

Next day, when i started getting baked............. i laughed ???????????????

what can i do.............

Sonu Anand

ps. family don't take note.