17 December, 2012

Learning the real language of Communication: reading between the lines


Learning the real language of Communication: reading between the lines

Communication: letting the other person or a group of people know what you want from them. 
That’s what communication is.
I have never believed myself to be a good communicator of what I have wanted. As a kid, I was always clueless how to let people know of my feelings. I was always scared  that it would be denied. This has to do something with my childhood spent in the prison called hostel. I was admitted to a hostel when I was four and a half. So, as you can imagine  when I was out, I was some rat scared of all the cats if I asked my share of cheese.
As, a kid I would not be stubborn. I would ask once if it was a No. I would take that as a Genuine No. I never could learn the art of communication. I never was able to play Communication communication.
Once one of my brothers asked me, why don’t I show stubbornness like other kids or request. What I could say, I was not aware that was the general way to communicate get what you want.
I have always preferred the straight way. Say what you want straight away no beating around the bush. But beating around the bush is the common way. Let it be, why do I care.
I care about just one thing. My growth should not be hampered because of this human stupidity. Because of the flaw in communication in such a wide scale.
I wanted a simple way of communication with minimal contact  with my fellow humans because I love my lone time. I don’t want crowd that is the result of this flawed communication where you read between the lines the thing is this is just a game developed over time to kill time. What can be said simply no we will play. What I can make you understand in one day. I will take more than a month.
Oh! you can’t say things so directly it might hurt.  Oh shut up please…
When I joined my graduation as a communication student everyone was surprised who knew me. They felt I lacked communication skills. And then when I joined theatre as a actor they freaked out.
A person who never attended any cultural event in school. Never participated in any social activity. I would even skip weddings If I was not forced to go by my family. 
I just had a few things I loved to do..
*get up late.
*come back from school
*sit by the tv watch movies.
* go play with my few friends.
* come back home.
*pretend to study and then sleep.
My whole school was pretty this much and when I say this much it is this much.
Then came +2
*Hanging out with new set of friends. 4-5 of them.
* watch movies
*  this is it.
* add day dream about movies and being in them.

So, when I was in Grad. I went to college again a few friends. And then the theatre.
After a while I started ignoring college and mostly concentrated on theatre. When I say concentrated. I put myself to learn that craft because I crazily wanted to learn Drama, acting and every aspect related to it.
Never felt the desire to play along the communication playground. I was getting what I needed with a lot of difficulty of course but I was getting. I was always annoyed at people why don’t they talk straight say what they want of me.
But no it is such a fun game.
As an actor when we performed. The director said you need to read between the lines.
Between the lines means what is being said said. And what the real meaning is in what is being said said.
Huffff!!!
I never cared because I never needed to.
I got friends who would agree to my conversation.. accept me as I am.
But till I was a student my communication style didn’t hamper my progress. In fact, I excelled as a theatre student because of my concentration and focus to what I wanted.
But when I came to the real world.
Where work, money and power resides.
It slowly started to sink in ..
Reading between the lines is important. A different approach to communication is required.
In my personal space I can say what I mean and when ever but not where politics exist there you have to play the game of communication. Play on..
Because in professional as well as personal space..
People say something and mean something else..
That’s the catch, you need to read between the lines..
If  I can’t read between the lines. I need to get ready to be pushed over, tumbled and even crushed.
Being who you are is fine. But you need to communicate and let people know what you want from them and how much you can give them.
Speaking is important be it straight or  the real meaning may hide between the lines.
As, if you are clear you are free.
Isin’t ???

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