An Actor's Dilemma!

I started acting around 2006. I have not done a lot of work because I made a promise to myself to save guard my interests as an artist. I have worked with a lot of people only once because I didn't think it necessary to spend that great deal of time again. As it would not strengthen me as an artist. May weaken me for sure. Sitting at home reading books was and still is a better option for me than to work for, or with people that I can't admire. So I decided that  I would help myself grow with whatever understanding I could find, whatever would make sense to me. I saw so many actors stuck stagnant in their talent even if they were doing well otherwise. I told myself I have no business other than being the best version of me I can be. I knew what needed to be done. I knew I had to safeguard my interests. Safeguard the actor within. 

So many distractions, wrong paths suggested. But how to follow the path which may take you the right way. I started writing this blog, "Learning The Right Way". I have been in this quest since then. 

Figuring out the craft of acting. What it is exactly? How the hell do you transform from Person A to Person B. That has been my only quest!  Very Important very very very to not be influenced by wrong masters. Find a true master or be your own. In this digital age, everyone is at your finger tips. All the great masters of the world can be accessed and I did that. I am not saying I didn't find great teachers here. I did. My first teacher Nadira Zaheer Babbar gave me the best gift a student can want, She asked me to read, read and read. She said it will transform you into the best you. Reading is magic. and yes it was. It was magic.  Also, she said Hard Work is the only key to any kind of success. Total immersion.  I got these things slowly not immediately.  And many other teachers I had in my life like Juhi Babbar, Darpan Sir, Divya Palat. Everyone giving a new insight,  Juhi Babbar is someone who showed trust in me when I was zero. She gave me a big responsibility. Even though others thought I couldn't, I didn't know if I could. It was the start of the awesome journey of self-belief. Now if any work comes to me. All I say is, I don't know how to do it now but I will know eventually. Same is the process in characterization for me I never know, the journey may be painful but I am sure I'll reach there. Darpan Sir- He gave another gem. He said where ever you work, make sure you do whatever you do with so much zeal and dedication that when you are not there, people notice. They say, where is Sonu? I took it too seriously. Divya ran an improv class and the best thing she taught me was that I could be free and uninhibited.  Today the person I am could never be without these people. 

But what I wanted to talk here was the dilemma an actor faces in this country because of many insincere actors. That it is become a culture here in India that directors show you how to act. You have a scene to do and most of them will enact it for you and expect you to copy. 

I cannot agree to that. I don't believe in this. There are even senior actors who take pride in showing how to do a particular scene. The fun goes away for me. After I have seen it being done by someone what is it? Sheer imitation. Where is the thought, the discovery? To be able to say a simple line, 'How are you?" is a discovery you figure it out. What it means here? What is the relationship? What is going on? It is not so simple as copying someone else. 

What do you want to show by enacting it for others? That you can do well. After 20-30 years of experience obviously, you will be better than that newcomer. But if you let that new actor experience the scene for himself. If you let him discover? He might just give you something magical. 

I may have shown how to enact something initially but I realized it doesn't help. You have to show it again and again, every time. Imitation needs regular oiling while something that is a discovery needs nothing. Even after a year, that actor can perform with same intensity after one or two readings. Because it is in their heart. It is a discovery, not theft. It is theirs. We all experience life differently. We all feel in our own way. Some people feel much more while other do a little less. Let everyone find their own way. Don't walk the path with them show them maybe. 

Let other's take responsibility. Don't think you know every thing because you don't. When we don't know major things about our own personalities who are we to dictate the understanding we have of the world to others. 

Wouldn't it be beautiful, if, in a rehearsal, a director dissects the scene with the actor understanding the text and the subtext together rather than showing or telling this is how it is done? A fresher can never handle that pressure. Like you a senior can't handle the pressure if I pointed at a person in life and told you that's how I want it done. You may do it but it will be your version your interpretation. Wouldn't it???? Or you can give me exactly the same in a few minutes. You can mimic. One more question, as actors what are we looking at when an actor plays a role? How well can you mirror the mannerisms or, How well you can mirror the mind. The inner world. 

For me, without the inner world, there is no outer world. 

There always have been insincere actors but today the understanding of the craft is improving. All I ask you is treat each and everyone individually. 

Don't treat actors as a group because they are not. Same like life. Every individual has a different voice. You can't generalize. Treat everyone with the understanding that they bring in with them.